Sunday, July 31, 2011

A letter to God

Dear God, please make me see all the risk I'm taking . All the boundaries I'm breaking . All the hearts I'm hurting . It's all out of my control . Though, I'm still trying to make it better . I'm losing it . I began to hate myself and putting the blame on others and even you sometimes . Thats when I lost my mind . I lost balance of my life . Friends, family, academics, everything . The past was holding me back . I may heal, but the scars remain . Please strengthen me so that I could go on stronger . Help me be a better person . Don't make me forget who I am . Don't let me give up and be weak . Don't let those haters crush me . Don't let revenge come round for a visit . Show me the right road and the right thing to do . Guide me now and forever . Bless the people good to me, I love them . Amin

Saturday, July 30, 2011

Yesterday, went home at midnight ==' Helped mom for a farewell dinner *Pergh, kaki bagai nak putus!* Today, just got back from helping mom at a wedding . Met Kak Ain, AJ and Farouq

Happy Fasting Muslims :]

I don't wanna let go, bye

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Before you can grow up, you must fall in love3 times.

Once you must fall in love with your best friend, ruining your friendship forever. This will teach you who your true friends are, and the fine line between friendship and more.

Once you must fall in love with someone you believe to be perfect. You will learn that no one is perfect, and that you should never be treated as any less than you deserve

And once you must fall in love with someone that is exactly like you. This will teach you about who you are, and who you want to be.

And when you’re through with all that, you learn that the people who care about you the most are the ones that you hurt, and the ones that hurt you are the ones that you needed the most

But most of all, you learn that love is only a concept and is not something that can be defined, it is different to each person that experiences it. And you will learn to respect each and every person on this earth, knowing that everyone only wants to be loved

"I was losing myself to somebody else, but now I see . I don't wanna pretend so this is the end of you and me"
-The Veronicas-

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Looking back

Three BIG words I'm gonna be careful with later on

1. Promise
2. I love you
3. Forever

Rainbow behind the clouds

Yesterday, went to the clinic . I woke up and went up to the mirror . My left eye bloat . Great . I thought I could recover within a couple of days . Incorrect guess . I came to school crying . Every nightmare of last week was haunting me again . I bolted out of class . I don't want anyone to talk to me . The thought of being bright as a button faded . I made my way to the big stairs of Aspuri, waiting for someone to get me out of the school grounds . At the clinic, there were a lot of people, each with their own situation

Situation 1 : The Blind man
I was waiting for my name to be called for registration. Then someone accidently hit me from the back . I turned around to find a blind man walking with support from a stick . I got out of his way . Then, came a lady, she was beautiful, helping the blind guy . "Bless the blind man and the lady helping him" I said to myself smiling . Everyone lent a hand, helping the man make his way to see the doctor . Be thankful that you can still see the world . Even if its in destruction, you can change it to a whole better place

Situation 2 : The lucky baby
Still waiting for my name to be called . I sat at a chair near the entrance . Infront of me was a man holding his little girl in his arms . She was beautiful, cute in a beautiful dress . Her skin was fair, just like her parents . Her parents looked young to my guessing . Her mom was seeing the doctor, she was sick . Her dad had to look after her as her mom was busy .  He was busy calling and texting someone at the same time . Her dad kissed, hugged her . Embraced her with his love and care . Making her know the he's there . Right after her mom finished, she walked to her mom slowly then she fell . Her mom came right to her side, picking her up and wiping her tears . Then the family walked out hand-in-hand . Appreciate your parents . Even if their busy they'd still find time to spend with you . When your about to fall, they'd be there to catch you . Be a good son/daughter . Its your turn to make them proud of you

Situation 3 : Prince Charming to the rescue
Still waiting for my name to be called . I glanced around, thinking and waiting . Then, a couple walked in . The girl was crying . The guy had his arm around her shoulders, giving her comfort . Each of them had rings on their fingers . They're married I figured . The guy told her to take a seat while he'd do the registration for her . She sat next to me wiping her tears . She was obviously trying to make the tears stop . Her husband then sat next to her hugging her and kept telling her that he's there and there was nothing to worry about . Minutes passed, they were done . They sat at the same seat next to me . "Dah dah, I kan ada, takpayah nangis dah . Kalau dia serang you lagi I belasah dia cukup cukup . Biar dia tahu dia cari pasal dengan siapa" said the husband . The wife replied "Takpayahlah bang, yang lepas tu lepaslah" . "Nak makan tak? Ada gerai dekat belakang ni" asked the husband to his wife . "Jomlah, I malas nak fikir banyak" she answered . They both got up to their feet and made their way out . The husband opened the door for her and told her to be careful . Soon enough, they were out of sight . Guys, we girls would love to know that you care about us . Being a gentlemen would make her feel more lucky to have you . Take care of your girl

A trip to the clinic was fun . Being able to observe and make a conclusion from something . Maybe its a waste of time, waiting there with nothing to do . But, I learnt something meaningful . I walked away from the clinic with a smile . The All-Mighty is here for me, for everyone . Now be strong, got that? Have a blast


Finally home:)
after a month and a half of dead craziness and bullshit